Image of painting by Herb Kane with troops from Kamehameha fighting troops of Kalanikupele in a fierce battle for control. The Oahu soldiers are killed in mass by being pushed over the edge of the mountain to the valley floor below.
The Battle of Nuuanu Pali Lookout
Wow, great painting. Really makes you think about how sometimes unifying a kingdom means literally pushing your enemies off a cliff. Super inspirational. Next time I’m caught in traffic on the Pali Highway, I’ll be sure to whisper a soft “aloha” to the 400 warriors who got yeeted into history.
Also, love how Kamehameha just casually brought cannons to a spear fight. That’s not war — that’s Hawaiian Manifest Destiny with extra gunpowder.
Now before anyone comes at me saying “Erik, show some respect, that was a tragic event,” I’d like to remind you this is a public forum. I once saw someone call Genghis Khan a “sigma male,” so let’s all just take a breath and remember where we are.
Anyway…
BIG OL’ LESSON: If you’re gonna fight a battle on top of a cliff, maybe make sure you’re not the one standing on the edge. And if you’re watching this from a scenic lookout while double-fisting a spam musubi and a GoPro, maybe pour one out for the fallen.
👋 Aloha, history nerds. Stay respectful. Stay hydrated. And stay off cliffs.